Unlike DNA or a propensity to yell at the TV, hair shape and color are traits over which people can assert their control. Dominate follicles with today’s Groupon for hair services at Siggers Hairdressers. Choose from the following options:
- For $39, you get a cut and blow-dry (an $87 value).
- For $65, you get a cut, color, and blow-dry (a $148 value).
- For $80, you get a cut, highlights, and a blow-dry (a $207 value).
The masterminds behind Siggers—a salon that's nurtured strands since 1961—travel the globe to sponge up knowledge of the latest international styles and hair-care techniques. Master stylists shear follicles to complement each client's unique facial features and lifestyle needs, snipping off split ends and adding layers to enhance volume without a subwoofer. The professionals also know how to determine the most flattering all-over or highlight hues, making each coloring process as stress-free as dyeing Easter eggs while receiving a shoulder massage from a giant rabbit. After color treatments are complete, dryers blow warm kisses at updated noggins, which are sure to turn heads on homeward commutes or in self-produced shampoo commercials.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: What Makes a TV?
Enjoying television is as patriotic as knitting an apple pie or eating American flags. Here's a look at some of the components that make up these high-tech picture boxes:
• Glass: A high-end TV has a glass screen that when turned off (not recommended) will reflect your image. When turned on, it will reflect how awesome TV is.
• Cathode Ray Tube: No longer needed for modern TVs to work, but manufacturers still put one in every set just for old times' sake.
• Gold: TV signals, like men's hearts, are lustily attracted to gold, causing them to fly out of the sky into the gold brick in the back of every TV.
• A Couple of Horse Bones: 'Cause why not, right?
• Wires: They hook up to the wired helmets that all the actors wear to beam their acting into your TV.
• An Eternal Flame: To honor the former TV stars who have died.
• Tiny Fire Extinguisher: In case the eternal flame gets out of control.
• IBM PetaFlop SuperComputer: Guesses when you want to change the channel, lower the volume, etc., all to cover up the fact that the remote control doesn't do anything.
• Martin Sheen: He's gotta live somewhere.
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