After a long day of circling wagons, cowboys loved nothing more than hearing a ringing dinner bell and seeing their favorite horse preparing a bubble bath for them. Heed the call with today's Groupon: for $10, you get $20 worth of Western diner fare at Patsy's Cafe.
Patsy's foodsmiths craft a menu of hearty classics accessorized by house-made sauces and live music in the evenings, satisfying the appetites of mouths and ears alike. The dinner menu offers a hand-breaded slab of chuck steak, which reclines within a sheath of Patsy's signature cream gravy to form the chicken-fried steak ($10.95). Chefs concoct The John Kelso burger by heaping jalapeno-jack cheese, grilled onions, bacon, and a homemade spicy green-chile sauce atop a rustler-worthy patty ($8.95), and servings of house-made pie ($4.95) reward diners for their adherence to the food pyramid's warnings against swimming immediately after meals.
The lunch menu tides over appetites with an arsenal of sandwiches ($6.95+), as well as with two cowgirl fish tacos, whose flour tortillas brim with a kaleidoscopic confetti of jalapeno coleslaw, lime and cilantro aioli, and pico de gallo ($9.95). Live music graces Patsy's vibrant dining room with foot-tapping and tail-wagging performances on select evenings, upstaging the restaurant's expansive sunset mural and spur-bedecked table legs.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Karate Belts
Karate champions know that supreme mastery of the lethal art is dictated by meditation, nonviolence, and self-control. Because of this irony, all humans start as karate masters and become depreciably poorer at karate with each lesson they take. Here's a guide to punching and kicking your way through the different color-coordinated levels of karate:
- White Belt: Meant to blend seamlessly into your karategi (Japanese for combat pajamas), the white belt symbolizes that you are worried people will laugh if they find out your underdeveloped stomach muscles cannot hold up pants.
- Yellow Belt: The yellow belt is a portmanteau, indicating that you have mastered the first two karate skills—yelling and bellowing.
- Green Belt: This indicates that you have learned how to crush your opponent—so long as it's an aluminum can being rinsed and sorted for the recycling! Well done, Eco-Warrior!
- Purple Belt: You have mastered the deadly art of your own imagination. Dazzle and confuse the enemy with crude pastel drawings in which both your heads share a single body.
- Black Belt: The pupil has become the master, or, to put it in Western terms, the student has beaten up the teacher.
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