Alondra Hot Wings

The eponymous hot wings are Alondra's house specialty, fried and served with ranch or blue-cheese dressing, as well as celery and carrot sticks. Choose two sauces to accompany your platter of poignant poultry; options are ranked on a scale from mild to suicide and include such varietals as lemon-pepper, spicy barbecue, maple syrup, and Thai chili. Sate burgeoning grumbles with a six-piece platter served with fries ($7.25), or go deep and gobble up a 50-wing platter ($25.95) and finally prove to friends that commissioning a T-shirt made of wet wipes was a good idea.