People go to great lengths to achieve weight-loss goals, with plans that always seem to include a strict helium diet administered by a dirigible pilot. Expurgate unwanted weight without floating away with today's Groupon to Anew Allure in Great Neck. Choose between the following options:
For $999, you get an Aqualipo water-based liposuction procedure for one small area (a $3,500 value). Choose from the following areas:
- Chin
- Upper abdomen
- Lower abdomen
For $1,499, you get an Aqualipo water-based liposuction procedure for one large area (a $5,500 value). Choose from the following areas:
- Love handles
- Outer thighs
- Inner thighs
- Hips
- Arms
- Bra line
Anew Allure's skilled reshapers are board-certified plastic surgeons who sculpt clients' figures with Aqualipo, a water-based fat-removal system that sneaks under the skin to steal away lipid collections from designated bodily geography. During each procedure, a board-certified plastic surgeon photographs, marks, and sketches abstract self-portraits on the client's problem area before applying local anesthetic and cutting a small incision to reach the fat layer. Pulsing water jets then flush out fatty tissue with a sterile fluid, evicting lipids without stressing surrounding muscles, nerves, or other tissues. Procedures require no general anesthesia and typically last 30–45 minutes, leaving most patients ready for discharge 15 minutes after completion. Clients can expect more instant results and less intense side effects—such as swelling, bruising, and transmitting ham-radio signals uncontrollably—than those caused by conventional liposuction procedures.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Staying Dry in the Rain
Since meteorologists attend a rigorous eight-year weather-school program, most of which is spent learning how to drive a Doppler radar, they are able to describe the current weather with 100% accuracy. If your favorite weatherperson is telling you that it's raining, here are some devices you can use to stay dry:
Umbrella: The first umbrella consisted of only a metal skeletal system and, instead of being used to stay dry in the rain, was used to rake large, tabletop zen gardens. The umbrella can only be used to block rain when combined with a canopy made of a waterproof material, such as nylon coated in candle wax or seal skin.
Raincoat: This wearable umbrella was originally constructed with rubber, which, like paper and caskets, is derived from trees. Though the raincoat offers more mobility than an umbrella, it does not allow you to poke people from a safe distance.
Silica Gel Packets: Silica gel packets can be found in the pockets of brand-new leather jackets, slurping up excessive moisture to keep them from feeling too much like skin. These packets will have the same drying effect on your body when swallowed and absorbed into your body's ecosystem. If you can't find silica packets, cover yourself in blood, because it is thicker than water and will repel it.
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