Achieve dirt-free auto-genius with today’s Groupon: $10 gets you one month of unlimited Freaky Clean carwashes at Clean Freak, the freakiest, cleaniest, freak-cleaning freaker-cleaner in Phoenix.
In addition to being clean, Clean Freak is fast. After signing up, your vehicle’s front windshield will be branded with a special radio frequency ID (RFID) tag. That way you can simply zoom on through for the three-minute auto-sanitation, without interruption for payment or paperwork, over the entire month (each Groupon is limited to one vehicle because you must register your vehicle to activate the RFID). Scented soaps and soft foam scrubs will de-filth your ride, transforming it into a freak of a much cleaner nature. Clear coat protection will be applied for a long-lasting clean. You'll also get a scented towel and free vacuum usage, so you can maintain a clean interior between visits.
People love things more when they’re clean (loved ones, pets, tourniquets), and a car is no exception. Normal annoyances associated with driving, such as stop signs, traffic, and swerve-discouragement, will become immensely enjoyable. If you were too embarrassed to invite friends to sit shotgun, your social life can finally resume and you can stop doing awkward drive bys past your friends and crushes’ houses. Get this Groupon for a passive-aggressive gift for your carpool driver or for all your friends and stage a vehicular freak show.
Yelpers give Clean Freak 4.5 stars:
- I got the Clean Freak in my new hood.. Bajazam!! I love these guys bc I'm obsessive about my wheels.. On my car.. Being sparkly & new looking.. And don't dare leave spots on my newly clean car...These nice guys don't.. – Kimberly M.
- went through the car wash and it was so badass i filmed a video and posted it on youtube. ha. (http://www.youtube.com...) – Brittney S.
Freaks Cleaned Up
Clean Freak will clean your freaky-looking ride and make it something beautiful. Here are some famous freaks who got cleaned up and transformed into non-freaky successes:
- Mable McDonohue, The Mule Face Woman: Received extensive, complimentary facial reconstructive surgery to make her more closely resemble her favorite animal: the puppy. She unsuccessfully ran for mayor of Detroit as Mable, The Puppy-Faced Democrat, but was later appointed town treasurer, a position she mistakenly believed tasked her with finding treasure.
- Krang, The Missing Link: His abnormal body hair made him a close match for a sasquatch. After the real Sasquatch was found and killed in 1978, Krang underwent 29 rounds of laser hair removal. Today, he is co-owner of a karate studio and is happily married to several women in different states.
- Prince Coyle, The Caterpillar Man: Famous for coining the wholly inaccurate aphorism, “Can’t never have too many arms,” Prince Coyle was one of the biggest stars of the early freak circuit. He was shamed into retirement when he admitted to federal investigators that three of his seven arms were fake. Today, he is better known by his stage name, Ted Danson.
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Clean Freak Car Wash
When slowly inching toward the enormous porthole of Clean Freak Car Wash's façade, drivers may think they’re about to enter an oversized washing machine. Once at the entrance, a member of the Clean Freak staff ushers them into a glowing blue tunnel. Inside, a conveyor belt propels vehicles through multiple stations such as a foam wash and spot-free rinse. For an additional fee, the staff shines tires, throws in an air freshener, and wraps the car in a giant robe.