Many people prefer to rid their homes of pests without killing them, whether due to compassion, vegetarianism, or a government-mandated radio collar that prevents them from extinguishing a life. What are some convenient ways to get rid of pests without harming them?
Centipedes: These segmented killing machines want nothing more than to walk across your face while you're sleeping with their hundreds of imperceptibly tiny feet—don't let them. Trap any centipede you see under a cardboard box, and then duct tape the box's flaps to your floor, walls, and ceiling. Houseguests will dig your crazy style and try "boxing" in their own homes—even without centipedes!
Spiders: Leave these harmless killing machines alone! They work tirelessly to eliminate far worse pests such as bloodsucking houseflies and your roommate's shiftless boyfriend who is way more scared of spiders than he is of germs, judging from the amount of peanut butter he eats with just his finger.
Mice: Trapping a mouse, the most adorable of all repulsive vermin, in a killing machine would be truly inhumane. Instead, place it inside a small plastic terrarium with a soft bed of shredded newspaper and a bowl of pressed alfalfa pellets where it can live out the remainder of its days safely entombed by your massive and incomprehensible love.
