A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but a baby that isn't named by Groupon smells like missed opportunity. Spray your infant with the perfume of success with this Groupon.
$1,000 for Groupon to Name Your Baby ($1,000 Value)
All too often, the importance of a child's name takes a backseat to other "needs" such as food, shelter, and clothing. Groupon, the World's Foremost Authority in Baby Naming™, has stepped up to address this issue. Upon your child's birth, Groupon will relieve you of the burden of naming your baby by bestowing a specially selected, custom first name upon your infant son or daughter. Purchasers will e-mail Groupon with their voucher number, and we will e-mail you back with a name for your child based on the name's aesthetic value and for how it might look emblazoned on a trophy one day—for a child named by Groupon will grow tall and proud, and he or she will be a beacon of hope in a world that is in such desperate need of one. Don't settle for non-Groupon-approved names such as Kevin or Bridget—let us gift your sweet child with a moniker for the ages.
Groupon has been naming things since 2008, when it named itself by combining the words “grout” and “superweapon.” Its previous baby-related ventures include Grouspawn and its sponsorship of the all-infant rugby league, Tot Scrum.
"My daughter is named Clembough and will one day be president of this continent. Thanks, Groupon!"Deborah Rodbelt, mother of Clembough Rodbelt
"I had Groupon name my son because I wanted him to be proud of his future tombstone."Donald Clunch, father of Clembough Clunch