Working out is No. 3 on the list of most popular daily activities in America, behind not working out and teaching dogs to swear. Spend your time wisely with today's Groupon to Hardbody Outdoor Fitness. This Groupon is valid at the locations in Ellicott City and Columbia. Choose between the following options:
- For $35, you get a five-day pass ($15/class; a $75 total value).
- For $49, you get a one-month membership (a $139 value).
- For $65, you get a 10-day pass ($15/class; a $150 total value).
Led by certified and enthusiastic instructors, Hardbody Outdoor Fitness offers its adherents access to one-hour morning classes from 5:30 a.m. to 6:30 a.m. at Meadowbrook Park in the spring and summer and in Inside Out Performance in the fall and winter. Throughout each boot-camp-style regimen, lethargic muscles are forged into lethal weapons with resistance training, core work, and optional bionic reconstructive surgery. The functional program utilizes stability balls, medicine balls, hula hoops, resistance bands, jump ropes, and other equipment to emphasize balance and stabilize neurotic musculature. Sessions are also designed to work for and with people from all walks of life, from marathon runners to school teachers training to defeat a cruel chalkboard in hand-to-hand combat. Choose the 5- or 10-day pass to sample training sessions, or pick the one-month membership to take part in up to 16 one-hour classes.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Making a Wish
Throughout the day, the superstitious are afforded numerous opportunities to better their lives through making a wish. What are some tips to rising to the next wish-making occasion?
• Wishing Wells: Like most things in life, you get what you pay for. Though a wishing well's suggested minimum donation is 25 cents (save your pennies for the mall fountain outside the Cinnamon Xpress®), you can sweeten your wish a little by wrapping it in a check for $750. Or, simply whisper your wish into the HDMI port of a gently used plasma screen before chucking it in downward into the rattling darkness.
• Shooting Stars: Most dreams wished upon a shooting star don't come true because the wish casters don't finish the job. Drive at top speed to the smoldering impact site to confirm that the falling star is actually a fully undressed spaceman. He should be hugging his knees to his chest and ready to exchange wishes for Earth clothing and a room above your garage.
• Birthday Candles: Triple your annual wish-making potential each year by wishing for a genie. Do not, however, ask the genie to grant you the wish of additional birthdays, as the genie's legendary love of ironic interpretation will cause him to transform you into an extremely old man. Remember: the only truly safe way to wish for more wishes is to wish for garbage bags full of money.
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