Theft of a computer can be difficult for an owner, forcing one to recover lost data, reconcile with an old abacus, and plan a costly farewell party for the remaining household electronics. Prevent painful loss with today's Groupon for LoJack for Laptops from Absolute Software. Choose between the following options:
- For $30, you get a one-year premium subscription for laptop protection (a $60 value).
- For $55, you get three years of premium subscription for laptop protection (a $110 value).
Absolute Software watches over an international laptop flock with Computrace Agent security software, which bestows patented security paired with a human computer-recovery team. Upon installation, software snuggles into computer programming to automatically message Absolute Software's Monitoring Center at frequent intervals. The software empowers its mortal masters with preventive features, such as recovery messages that enable customers to alert recovery-team staff in the event of laptop loss, theft, or elopement. A device lock feature allows users to remotely block access to their missing gadgets and optionally display a customized lockout message with contact information for good-Samaritan eyes and ominous Shakespearean verse for others. Clients may also remotely erase their laptops' select sensitive data remotely, or like omnipotent grandmothers, track current and past locations using the software's GPS and WiFi geo-location. Premium subscriptions also protect gadgets with an added Service Guarantee, which may grant payments up to $1,000 if recovery-team members fail to enable data deletion or recover the computer.
Most of Absolute Software's dedicated theft-recovery team members draw from vast experience as law-enforcement personnel and detectives, some from gritty film-noir backgrounds. In the event of a theft and customer-filed police report, team technicians employ the recovery software's data to aid law enforcement in laptop retrieval. Recovery team troubleshooters may even be able to track down data such as photos, private correspondence, financial information, and dream journals from wiped or removed hard drives. Absolute Software partners with most operating systems, enabling harmonious software marriages on both PC and Apple devices.
Though Absolute Software sometimes features a discounted price online, this Groupon still offers the best deal available.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Substitute Teaching
Substitute teachers come to school when they learn a new fact that they just have to share with someone or when regular teachers run out of mental health. Here are some tips for taking over a class for a day:
Look the Part: Dress like a full-time teacher. If you don’t know how a teacher dresses because you never attended school, just wear a long-sleeve tank top, pants you can think in, and running shoes for chasing down students' dreams and turning them into more realistic dreams.
Write Your Name: Students today have exciting names such as Stycxx and K'ydyn, making it impossible for them to remember your boring, vowel-bloated moniker. Write your real name on the chalkboard, or simply go by "Sub Sandwich."
Give Them Options: Let your students choose between watching a movie and not watching a movie. Anyone who chooses not to watch a movie must stay late after school and watch two movies.
Take Control: Don't let the class get out of control. Before speaking, students should raise their hands, and before thinking, they should be reminded that their opinions are smaller than those of their teacher.
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