The deal is on!
Hitting a hole in one is like accidentally swallowing a flying unicorn—the moment will taste like rainbows, but without witnesses, no one will ever believe it happened. Shoot a fairy-tale round of golf in the midst of eyewitnesses with today's Groupon: for $35, you get one 18-hole round plus a golf cart at Pembroke Country Club in Pembroke, 30 minutes south of Boston. Birdie pursuers should call ahead to set up a tee time and mention their Groupon.
Pembroke Country Club’s green, foliage-packed 6,532-yard course is known for its well-maintained landscaping, its challenging par 5 holes, and its sensual Jacuzzi water hazards. After warming up on the straight-shot first hole, you might find yourself sucker-punched by the well-bunkered third’s undulating green, leftward water hazard, and punishing par 3. If you thrive on challenge, attempt to go where eagles dare with the sharply dog-legged 561-yard 13th hole or the pond-sloping greens on the 11th. Navigating the extensive grounds in the included golf cart will keep fatigue to a minimum. To improve their odds of overcoming the course’s steepest obstacles, perfectionists can hone their wrist action at the practice area. Stock up on a last-minute package of golf tees at Pembroke's pro shop, as well as a replica of the golf clubs that Jimi Hendrix rebelliously set on fire at the Monterey Country Club.
Recently bought by former hockey superstar Jeremy Roenick, Pembroke Country Club's new management has invigorated the course's fairways and greens, and given Roenick a chance to demonstrate his 680-yard drive before brawling with beloved game-show hosts. Though Roenick is allowed to take the green wearing a goalie’s mask, Pembroke's dress code is strictly enforced, so golfers should be certain to not wear cut-offs, jeans, and shirts without a collar; in general, try to look as well groomed as the course itself. Grab your three closest parallel-dimension doppelgängers and enjoy a fun day of golfing and anger management at Pembroke Country Club.
Pembroke Country Club is a spike-less facility.
Groupon Says
The Whichest Link?
Gathering your plaid-pantsed buddies for a rousing round of hole-in-ball is also known as playing golf, or alternatively as hitting the links. But how can you be sure that the links you're hitting refer to a golf course and not one of the word's many other definitions? This disambiguation should help you out:
If your links are tube-shaped edible casings surrounding a mish-mash of savory ground meats: These are sausage links. Continue pulverizing them to sprinkle them across a pizza, or just slap them on the griddle for a handheld treat that's mostly meat!
If your links are interlocking ovoid rings of metal: These are chain links. You most commonly encounter them in the form of fences surrounding scrap-metal yards, collars encircling the necks of pit bulls guarding scrap-metal yards, or shackled lengths binding you to other men who thought they could get away with breaking into scrap-metal yards.
If your links is spelled L-Y-N-X: This is the North American Black-Tufted Bobcat. Though relatively harmless if spotted from a distance, your unprovoked slugging has given it the wherewithal to eat your scalp.
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