Your teeth are your mouth's ambassadors, your ticket to nachos, and the only things keeping your tongue in your head. Toughen your nacho ticket with today's Groupon: for $59, you get a teeth cleaning, oral exam, and set of x-rays at Prudential Dental (a $313 value). This deal is valid at either the Prudential location in Back Bay or the Financial District.
Prudential Dental's smile-savvy squad of doctors buff up fading mouth stalagmites and espouse oral health with a bevy of doting services. Dental doyens begin with a new patient exam, during which they comb mouthscapes for sinkholes, screen for oral cancer, and ensure gums are prepared for upcoming corn-on-the-cob sculpting contests. Then a basic cleaning purges plaque and dethrones tyrannical tartar to restore cleanliness to mouth kingdoms. Prudential's molar maestros conclude with four bitewing x-rays to ascertain bone levels, search for lesions, and expose bicuspids' gummy-bear stockpiles.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Faking Your Own Death
With piano-recital season coming up, faking one's own death is becoming more and more popular. Here are some tips for those who want a clean slate:
Make Sure It's for You: Faking your death is a lot of work and not tax-deductible, so you have to be sure.
Convincing is the Name of the Game: Your fake death cannot have even the slightest hint that it was not real. If you want to go the extra mile, leave a note by your bed that reads, "I really murdered this person. There was blood from it but this person had invisible blood. His/her last words were, 'Leave $500 in the mailbox every Wednesday night in my memory.' From: The real murderer."
Do It with Style: This is your chance to "go out" in a blaze of glory. If your death doesn't involve fireworks, Ferraris, free buffalo wings, a ton of hunks and babes, and the Bob's Big Boy mascot, go back to the drawing board.
Grim-Reap the Benefits: If you did a good job, then you have fooled the universe and are now immortal. Enjoy a life of jumping off buildings to prove a point and watching everything you love slowly decay into entropic nothingness. Also, you now get 15% off all submarine sandwiches.
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