Although Italians originally invented pasta as a fastener to keep Sicily from floating away, they abandoned it for less delicious moorings after locals on both sides kept snacking their way toward separation. Tether your taste buds to today's Groupon to Rocco’s Ristorante Italiano, located in the Quality Inn Mic Mac hotel in Dartmouth. Choose between two dining options:
• For $25, you get $50 worth of dinner and drinks.
• For $59, you get a tableside dinner for two (a $144 value).
Rocco’s Ristorante Italiano serves up gourmet Southern Italian cuisine with a touch of local flair and a caress of European influence. Original owner Rocco Scarola opened his house of penne and prosciutto after moving to Canada from Italy, and his marinara-doused menu boasts pastas such as the linguine alla pescatore, interlacing a medley of shrimp, scallops, and calamari ($21). The veal or beef fillet distracts steak knives from bullying defenseless soup spoons ($32), and the chicken cordon bleu dons a garland of black-forest ham and swiss cheese ($18). Those who opt for the tableside dinner enjoy a culinary show bested only by the now-banned practice of tomato juggling. Talented chefs festoon tables with plates custom crafted to suit every diner's palate, including the perennial favourite, Rocco's signature caesar salad. The entree selections change weekly but consistently pack a proteinaceous punch of seafood, pasta, veal, and chicken, complemented by a bottle of wine and two mugs of specialty coffee.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Choosing Your Own Adventure
Brave Sir Benneton nervously gripped his sword with the enchanted sword handle. He paused to think, "I don't like the feeling that walking into this cave gives me. I'd better pause to think."
If you want Sir Benneton to go into the cave, scroll down to II. If you don't want him to go into a dangerous cave, scroll down to III.
II. Uh-oh, Sir Benneton died by way of your decisions.
III. "Nope, not doing it," thought Sir Benneton. "Caves are boring and probably hard to write about. I'd rather go on a quest." He remembered the three quests in his quest planner. "I must choose one of my three quests," thought the slightly brave knight.
If you want Sir Benneton to attack the evil witches of Death Mountain, scroll back up to II, genius. If you want Sir Benneton to fight the evil Orcs of Lothlórien, scroll down to IV. If you want Sir Benneton to undergo the 12 Trials of the Elder Tablets, scroll down to V.
IV. Rent The Lord of the Rings and pretend Sir Benneton is one of the sword guys.
V. Sir Benneton rode to his friend Saltobius, wizard and knower of the way. "Saltobius," he said. "Pray tell what you know of the 12 Trials of the Elder Tablets."
"Oh, my," replied Saltobius. "To achieve them is a meandering quest, fraught with peril and rich with complex symbolism! Why, even the first trial is made up of hundreds of tedious steps that serve as a sort of allegory for man's internal struggle. Beware, Sir Benneton, for this undertaking will require dozens and dozens of tough decisions, the outcomes of which could take you down startlingly divergent paths. Steel thyself for what follows. First, you must—"
Just then, some big rocks fell off a cliff above them. They were instantly crushed. Forever.
Scroll up to II.
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