Without the loosening effects of massage, shoulders would stiffen into immobility and fall victim to freeloading parrots and the burden of carrying Earth's heavyset brother, Girth. Pamper your perches with today's Groupon to Therapeutic Massage Techniques. Choose between the following options:
- For $30, you get a 60-minute Swedish or deep-tissue massage (a $60 value).
- For $42, you get a 90-minute Swedish or deep-tissue massage (a $90 value).
The muscle manipulators at Therapeutic Massage Techniques choreograph a finger dance across aching backs and stressed shoulders to help relieve muscle pain and tightness. Throughout each deep-tissue session, clients admire a prime view of the floor and their therapist’s clogging skills as certified hands hypnotize backs with deep kneading that aims to soothe pain and unbundle corporeal knots. Alternatively, relaxers can opt for the long and flowing strokes of a Swedish massage, which melts away tenderness like reciting the Geneva Convention in lieu of marriage vows. To ensure the most enjoyable and beneficial massage, therapists encourage clients to give feedback about their specific pains and pressure preferences throughout each treatment.
Therapeutic Massage Techniques
David Rabson at Therapeutic Massage Techniques choreographs slow waltzes with his fingers—strengthened by years of piano playing—his hands kneading sinews to bolster health and elicit relaxed sighs. At the clinic, Rabson aids spines with muscle-melting massage sessions and Swedish techniques. Therapeutic Massage Techniques also offers facial lifts, which stimulate collagen production, boost circulation, and make complexions glow more radiantly than a baby polar bear at a laser-light show.