Bistros are remarkable in that they somehow manage to be both fancy and casual at the same time, much like a necktie with Taz on it. Feel gussied up without too much fuss with today's Groupon at On The Menu in Davie. Choose between the following options:
- For $20, you get $45 worth of dinner cuisine and drinks.
- For $10, you get $25 worth of lunch cuisine and drinks.
The culinary masters at On The Menu prepare a bevy of healthy European dishes with a particular emphasis on French cooking and fresh, organic ingredients. Opt for lunch and take your pick of cold sandwiches, hot paninis, or quiche. Vegetarians can indulge well-behaved taste buds with a delectable greek salad served on freshly baked homemade bread ($8.95). Match your midday provisions with a complimentary libation, such as organic green tea ($2) or espresso ($2.45). Neptunian dinner fare offers an opportunity to nibble a delicious amalgamation of fish, mussels, calamari, and shrimp in the zuppa de pesce ($24). Pair an entree selection with the spirituous progeny of a grapevine, an imported beer, or a swan folded into the shape of a napkin.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Children's Parties
Because 2011 is a leap year, the many children who would technically not have a birthday during a stationary year are burdening party stores everywhere with excess celebration requests. Here's a guide to throwing your child the perfect party:
Pick a Theme: For boys, fire-truck-themed parties are fun and inexpensive—simply order some fire trucks by calling 911 and demanding that the professionals come to your house and set something on fire—it's your right as a taxpayer. For girls, princess-themed parties can give your little ones the unrealistic expectations of privilege and romance they'll need to succeed in the real world.
Hire Entertainment: Instead of hiring a clown or a magician, hire a clown and a magician to fight each other. If your child has a love of reading and the arts, hire a bodybuilder to discourage these frivolous pursuits with free demonstrations of muscle tone and hoisting. And remember, circus animals are both entertaining and delicious.
Make Your Child Feel Special: Most kids spend their days underground in dank learning mines and their nights cracking walnuts to improve their grip strength. Make them the center of attention by drawing them a homemade map of the solar system that has them in the center, where the Earth would usually go.
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