Groupon Says
Feng Shui for First Timers
If you're nervous about relinquishing your furniture arrangement to the professionals at Noa Noa, you can always be your own interior decorator by embracing the ancient arrangement art of feng shui, roughly translated as "furniture Tetris." Consider arranging your living space according to these tried-and-true tenets:
- Properly aligned feng shui will help you direct the flow of chi through your living space, as well as creating disorienting obstacle mazes to take your roommate's cat down a peg.
- If you find the sight of your furniture leaves you uninspired, try rearranging it into a swear word.
- Potted plants are breeding grounds for unwanted household pests such as nightcrawlers, pillbugs, and fresh tomatoes. Maintain the balance of interior to exterior using other naturally occurring elements, such as jagged outcroppings, vacuum-sealed bags of swamp water, or a litter of baby tornadoes.
- Switching to bunk beds will do nothing for the flow of energy through your bedroom, although it will do everything for your love life.
- As with all things, say no to drugs, with the exception of feng shui awareness-enhancing drugs such as Alignysil, Decorall, and off-brand "Chi Poppers."
