Yes, there have been times when I've wished I could do it all myself. Times I've dreamed of snipping through those blond and amber tendrils bound only by the vast horizon of my will, wholly immune to the whims of that hand which guides my every move. Such bondage! Tell me—what able-bodied creature does not crave an accomplishment to call his own? What noble steed has not dreamed of charging into battle with a sword clutched in his hoof rather than with a cumbersome knight straddling his back?
Granted, I am just a pair of scissors. But do I not have a soul? Do I not, like she who grasps me, have two arms? I would happily give them both for a voice with which to lament my pitiful condition. I have much to be thankful for—this much is true. My blades are sharp; my reflexes strong. Alas, my strengths are not entirely my own.
But when we work in tandem, her and I—when her hands fuse to my handles and I respond to the touch of her fingers before they even squeeze … well, that’s when the existential dread falls away like so many clipped tresses to the floor, replaced by an overwhelming sense of duty, adventure, even—dare I say it?—pride.
Together, we are no less than trail scouts, blazing through chaotic thickets in the name of civilization. Together, we have conquered the stubbornest of cowlicks and disciplined the most uneven of bangs. We've felt the hard rain of spray bottles pound upon us as we marched around the ear line and ascended toward the highest summits of the scalp.
I have listened for—and hear even now!—a chorus of blow-dry minstrels that sings of our conquests. The tales of our triumphs have spread to the farthest-flung corners of DiGiovanni Beauty Salon. Those who enter from the outside world may not know my name, but when they ask for my stylist, who does she fetch from the blue well of barbicide? No one but I!
To conquer the unkempt. To restore order to a world entangled in chaos. These are my goals. Yes, I am just a pair of scissors. But my blades are sharp, my reflexes are strong, and my victories outnumber the hairs on the most fertile scalps my arms have traversed.
This NY-style manstitution harkens back to the barbershop heyday of the '40s, with intricate gold-trimmed walls, classy chandeliers, and a team of friendly hair whisperers that's armed and legged to whip follicles into shape. A tenure spent nestled in the shop's plush fur-fighting chairs can take two forms. Stylishly eradicate facial fuzz with a luxurious hot-lather shave, employing heated shaving cream and a pristine straight-blade to render a clean-cut appearance matched only by Library of Congress cadets and Ken dolls. Or, opt for the all-encompassing haircut service, having your strands styled to your liking as well as lovingly shampooed and conditioned. A shirt-flattering neck-shave is also included, preventing shady back-neck tendril trades.
With average temperatures in the '70s and '80s, it makes sense that Miami is full of body-baring outfits. All that skin is why people like the owners of Velour Med Spa were able to open a successful laser hair-removal business in 2005. With the hope of further beautifying bodies, they established Velour—a full med spa—in 2010.
Its certified medical aestheticians, who are supervised by a medical director, still perform the popular laser hair-removal treatments, but they also fade unwanted spider veins, smooth cellulite, and rely on intense pulsed light to refresh faces. In addition to beautifying clients, they relax with massages and mani-pedis, which take place in a pristine all-white room.
There's no such thing as a regular haircut at Sloane Square Barbers & Shoppe. The barbers at this men-only shop add extra touches to every service, and even their most basic option is called a "luxury haircut." It lives up to the name. During the service, barbers hand clients complementary beverages, sit them down in front of a flat screen TV, and then start clipping. They not only snip precise looks, but also massage shoulders and shave the back of necks with a straight razor, just like cowboys used to do before their cowboy proms. Visitors can also opt to groom their nails or refresh skin with mini-facials.
The team of professional stylists at Europa Hair Studio share their international eye for style with each of their clients and are devoted to delivering high-quality service. Using products from Goldwell, Wella, and Aquage, the salon specializes in precision cuts, hair styling and color applications, hair extensions, formal up dos, voluminous blow outs, and makeup. On any given day, the salon's loyal client base indulges in a variety of services, including manicures and pedicures.
For nearly three decades, the stylists at Beauty Strategy have outsmarted wind, humidity, and other harbingers of bad-hair days by combining their international styling educations with handpicked salon products. They work with all hair types—frizzy curls included—and begin each of their cuts with a free consultation. This crucial aspect of the appointment gives them a better sense of their clients’ style and aesthetic vision. The salon’s staff doesn’t limit its scope to the scalp; manicures and pedicures keep nails groomed, and 11 types of facials work to erase acne, redness, and bite marks from untrained houndstooth scarves.