Nightlife in Emeryville

Have you ever seen someone smell a glass of wine and remark on its “lemony overtones” or “essence of plum” and wondered if they had any idea what they were talking about? Usually you're right, and they're pulling words from the 2009 Unabridged Wine Libs Dictionary. Pair one word from the "Obscure Fruits and Woods" chapter with another from "Vague Concepts" and you've got a smart-sounding wine description. How many times have we heard a Wine Libs poser foolishly declare that a wine resonated with "cedar echoes?" Too many times to count on one seven-fingered hand—eight times, to be precise.

In the most recent installment of Consumer Reports, stand-up comedy was named the far superior postural form of comedy, beating out sit-down, lying-on-your-side, spread eagle, Indian-style, running-in-place, crucifixion pose, hunched-over-out-of-breath, kneeling-on-your-right-knee-while-tying-your-left-shoe, Statue of Liberty, King Tut, Napoleon Bonaparte, and the Heisman. The magazine's editors concluded that other comedy stances proved too distracting and greatly limited the comic's material (most jokes told in the King Tut pose went something like "Hey, somebody let me outta this coffin, I'm dyin' in here…").