Modifying menu items has irritated servers for centuries, directly leading to the Colfax Riot of 1873, the Attica Prison Riot of 1971, and the decline of R & B music. Today’s Groupon avoids world-altering events by letting you orchestrate your own orders: $10 gets you $25 worth of food and drink at The Real Chow Baby, Atlanta’s first and only create-your-own-stir-fry restaurant. Chow Baby is believed to be impervious to the harm of the natural world and all human weaponry, but rumors exist of a Nap Baby, born at the exact same moment and radiating concentric circles of pure, narcoleptic calm. Perhaps, if they are one day reunited, this madness will finally end. Until then, color-coded Chow Baby alert levels hold steady at fuschia: wary.