Nightlife in Massapequa

If you're serious about laughing, you’re doomed to never reach your goal, for the serious mind never laughs. But if you have a nice, laid-back appreciation for laughing, Comix is your kind of place. It’s calendar is loaded with free nights with local performers and evenings with nationally known comedians, including Jamie Kennedy, Drew Fraser, and Arj Barker. Restaurants and clubs surround Comix, making it a great starting point for a night out with friends (or a great ending point for a night out with friends who have curfews).

Pulse, New York’s only multimedia lounge, is hip and modern in a space-age way, decked out with Rock Band, moody lights, and six private suites. Pulse also has a fully stocked bar and tons of appetizers. If you’re ambitious and attention-starved, hold center stage all night and redeem your $50 Groupon for 50 songs. The wide musical selection spans from all the top 40 classics to Korean and Chinese hits, so throw down to chart-topper “Just Dance” by Lady Gaga or show off your surprising linguistic abilities with karaoke favorites “把箸氾伴蛤” by 氾伴把 and “氾伴伴箸” by 伴氾 featuring Pat Boone.

With Irish pubs popping up left and right (there are currently 6.9 Irish pubs per citizen), it's becoming increasingly difficult for Ireland to inspect each pub and authenticate its Irishness. The process is tedious: authentic Irish people are shipped across the Atlantic on an Irish ferry, then endure a grueling one-month pub-inspection class before inspecting an Irish pub using the following criteria:

Bar 108 offers a wide array of international beer, wine, champagne, and liquor, and the full kitchen serves pub food like sliders and tacos. Since opening in January, the elegant and cool Soho hotspot has quickly become a popular gathering place for elegant and cool people, scoring numerous raving features by publications like The Luxury Spot and Time Out New York.

You can’t puff on planes and you can’t light up in the library—today’s Groupon is your last chance to save the rarefied preserve of the endangered cigar consumer. Velvet Cigar Lounge is one of the few remaining smoking sanctuaries where these gentlemanly creatures can enjoy delicious hand-rolled tubes of tobacco goodness in unharried comfort. Save the species by taking advantage of today’s deal: $20 gets you $40 worth of the Velvet Cigar Line of Cuban-seeded joy.

Premeditated comedy is the same thing as premeditated crime—both would be more hilarious if spontaneous. Seat yourself before a scene of utter unpredictability with today's delightfully inconsistent deal: for $9, you get one ticket to an improv show at Manhattan's National Comedy Theatre (a $15 value), plus free popcorn (a $2 value) to satisfy your late-night, comedy-induced cravings. Watch as NCT's talented players face off in a hilarious improvised competition at 9:45 p.m. on Friday or Saturday nights. NCT's show is completely different every time and funny for all ages, so grab your 2.5 children and 8.7 grandnieces. You haven't had a family laugh this good since that time the dog fell down the stairs and was basically fine.