For the last 20 years, satanic cults, monsters, and the undead have been congregating at The House of Shock to perform unspeakable horrors in the name of Halloween. Envisioned by a crack team of fright experts, including Pantera frontman Phil Anselmo, this seasonal haunt has been featured in the Travel Channel's Halloween's Most Extreme, Rolling Stone, Maxim, and Top Haunts magazine's list of the Top 13 Haunts nationwide. The house's exhibits are so scary that they've caused some extreme reactions. Allegedly, one patron's heart stopped beating. After she was resuscitated and rushed to the hospital, it was determined she had technically been dead for a short period.
As a live metal band strikes its first ominous chords, the fright fest kicks off with a nightly horror show of pyrotechnics, death metal, live stunts, and masochists. Adrenaline levels soar as courageous guests tiptoe through the coffins, ornate gravestones, and crumbling mausoleums of an ancient graveyard. The house's professional actors don't just slink by waving chainsaws and body parts—they tear apart bodies and scare the dickens out of guests who brave the interactive horrors of a funeral parlor, a morgue, and a butcher shop's dreadfully rotten cuts of beef. The adventure reaches terrifying new heights in a controversial satanic church, where flickering candles and hellfire cast eerie shadows on demonic worshipers and their torture victims. The onsite Hell's Kitchen churns out thematic eats and adult beverages to help frightened guests regain their senses before they revert to a mental world where the only conflict is over which Teletubby wore it best.
Jeff's Haberdashery swathes gentlemen in stylish, comfortable attire fit for any occasion or social situation, including casual wear by Joe's Jeans, Tommy Bahama, and Citizen, and formalwear by Coppley and Canali. Keep feet fashionable with a pair of Ova Da Fut socks ($40), or add flare to closets with a Robert Graham buttondown, replete with colorful patterns and long sleeves to cover up ill-advised elbow tattoos ($148). For occasions that require a refined look, such as weddings or inaugural post-office visits, drape torsos in a lightweight Coppley sport coat ($795), a Talia sport coat (up to $500), or a Canali suit imported from Italy ($1,695). Jeff's provides free tailoring for any purchased items, ensuring sport coats and dress pants fit like a masterfully modified glove.
H&R Block's talented tariff technicians assist busy taxpayers with their cent-saving savvy and expert customer service. The easy-to-follow in-office consultations allow taxpayers to sit down with one of H&R Block's nimble number-crunchers for a pow-wow on how to make sense of tax twists and turns, and help them avoid costly mistakes and almost-as-costly hand-cramps. After providing H&R Block's tax professionals with personal papers culled from the company's tax preparation checklist (including calculation-ready records of retirement income, education costs, and deductions from charity fish-eating contests), customers can sit back while their human calculators devise a custom filing backed up with the benefit of a maximum-refund guarantee and professional audit support, if needed.
Catering to the French Quarter since 1929, Bottom of the Cup Tea Room invites visitors to breathe in the soothing flavors of more than 100 fair-trade-certified tea-leaf varieties while peeking into their future via tarot cards, palm readings, and more. Sold in 4-ounce and 1-pound quantities, the shop's tea leaves invoke flavors from around the world, from the fruity aroma of the Bourbon Street vanilla rooibos or plum-pear ceylon teas to the lively spark of the indian spiced chai (all $9.98/4-ounce package). The formosa oolong tea ($19.98/4-ounce package) blends the slightly toasty taste of semifermented leaves with a dash of dry sweetness, ideal for breakfast or for filling up one's dunk tank.
Dombourian Oriental Rugs has bought, sold, cleaned, and repaired decorative floor coverings for more than a century. The showroom displays everything from antique Persian specimens from the 1890s and new oriental rugs made of angora wool to handmade 2'x3' rugs imported from India ($170–$225) and 3'x5' handwoven pieces ($225–$325). Professional rug cleaning, available for customer drop-off ($2.50/sq. ft.) or with pickup and delivery service ($3/sq. ft.), evicts dirt, dander, and inexplicable crop circles from floor décor. The shop's expert scrubbers employ a time-honored process, hand-washing rugs with soap and water before hanging them for a thorough air dry, which preserves the color and integrity. Dombourian also sells rug pads, which help curb potentially painful pratfalls and keep absconder carpets from escaping with drop-off ($2/sq. ft.) or pickup and delivery service ($3/sq. ft.).