Clothes make the man, just as monocles make the millionaire and swimming pools full of monocles make the billionaire. Polish your apparel with today’s Groupon to Kahuna Cleaners, valid at four locations in Frankfort, Lawrenceburg, and Louisville. Choose from the following options:
- For $10, you get dry cleaning for 5 garments (up to a $23.75 value).
- For $21, you get dry cleaning for 10 garments (up to a $47.50 value).
- For $31, you get dry cleaning for 15 garments (up to a $71.25 value).
For more than 10 years, the degriming gurus at Kahuna Cleaners have tackled stains and wrinkles before returning clothes to their wearers in tiptop shape. With this Groupon, visitors can bring in 5, 10, or 15 garments such as men’s sports jackets, blouses, or more than a week’s worth of hot-dog costumes for rejuvenation. Advanced cleaning processes treat the garments to a thorough cleansing, restoring them to immaculate condition as wrinkles from practicing origami on skirts smooth away and splotches from spilled coffee are banished from button-downs. Clients preparing for a black-tie affairs or weddings can place their formalwear or bridal gowns in Kahuna's care to remove stains before or after special events. Kahuna Cleaners also confronts the dust, mold, and soil collected by draperies and bedding, sending them back to houses in neat, clean folds to spruce up windows or salt-water aquariums.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Computer Function Keys
Every computer keyboard comes equipped with 12 preconfigured function keys, all of which can be easily removed and swallowed. Here's what your computer does when you press these:
F1: Prints
F2: Makes monitor only display color in shades of brown
F3: Forces keyboard to slowly ooze Vaseline for comfort purposes
F4: Prints two copies
F5: Buys rights to domain name "sensualpizza.net"
F6: Replaces desktop image with beautiful photo of a mountain that's on fire
F7: Brings up a bunch of Quaker Oats commercials
F8: Substitutes ".pdf" extension with ".hummus"
F9: Predicts how many biological parents you have
F10: Increases internal computer temperature by one degree
F11: Doesn't do anything
F12: Navigates to a website that compiles photos of puppies that are all now ugly, unlovable adult dogs
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