Although feeling the burn during a workout is generally a good sign, feeling the burn while sitting on the sofa means your sofa is in the fireplace. Engage in controlled, constructive body burning with today's Groupon to the Alper JCC's fitness facility. Choose between the following options:
- For $45, you get a two-month single membership (a $96 value).
- For $95, you get a two-month family membership (a $196 value).
The Alper JCC provides more than 5,000 square feet of amenities for muscle-magnifying guests. Pump iron in the state-of-the-art facility, equipped with ellipticals, rowers, cardio machines with personal flat-screen TVs, and monkey bars, where monkeys can enjoy top-shelf libations. Ball fanatics can engage in close competition on one of the two indoor basketball courts, three indoor racquetball courts, as well as tennis courts and baseball fields. Swimmers or dolphins escaped from the zoo can practice their backstroke in the junior Olympic-size heated pool.
While body-bolstering parents take advantage of the free mat Pilates, circuit training, and kickboxing group classes, youngsters can shoot the breeze in the complimentary childcare center. After each sweat-inducing session, athletes can refresh themselves in the locker rooms, equipped with showers, steam rooms, and saunas, where heat can extract body toxins, purifying pores and melting muscles the way a flock of baby dragons melts the heart.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Surfing the Internet
Containing everything from the great works of literature to spoilers for the upcoming presidential election, the Internet can be a valuable resource—if you know how to use it. Use these tips to ensure a productive trip to cyberspace and back:
- Type the word surf into your computer's keyboard at anytime to access your Internet's web browser.
- If your computer is less than 10 years old, your browser must be voice navigated. Shout such things as "photo of a helicopter" or "birth parents?" and let the Internet do the rest.
- The Internet has more than 60 websites. Remember your favorites by "bookmarking" them (writing their names down on a bookmark you keep nailed to your computer).
- Surf safely. Not only is this practical advice, it's also the name of the web's official mascot, Surf Safely, the surfing coyote who reminds children not to burn down the Internet.
- Unplug and unwind. Using the Internet for more than four minutes a day will cause hair to grow uncontrollably from your mouth.
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