Booking your body double a beautifying treatment at a tranquil day spa creates a soundproof alibi for days spent stealing office supplies from the National Guard. Make your stand-in stand out and replace your tape with bazooka putty with today’s Groupon: your choice of spa services at Beniley Waxing Center & Spa in Adventura. Choose from the following options:
- For $7, you get a European waxing (up to a $45 value).
- For $29, you get a 60-minute European facial (a $75 value).
- For $29, you get a 30-minute microdermabrasion (a $110 value).
Beniley Waxing Center & Spa is a comfy beauty abode with a staff of aestheticians experienced in the arts of gentleness and comeliness. Entrust your aesthetic enhancement to this fleet of allurement warriors and you won't be disappointed––unlike Pat Boone, who is constantly disappointed. Waxing is available for both men and women. Cut down on wind resistance with a full-leg wax ($40 for women, $45 for men), chest wax ($30 for men), or full-back wax ($30 for men). Or, gain the upper hand in arm-wrestling matches with a full-arm wax ($25 for women, $30 for men). A full-facial wax ($25 for women, $35 for men; both not including eyebrows) can significantly shorten a morning routine, leaving more time for untangling coat hangers.
Beniley Waxing Center & Spa's signature European facial is customized to suit any skin's condition. The warm and friendly aestheticians know skin like the back of their own skin-covered hands, having been trained by Beniley herself, a world-traveled expert on all things beauty. The staff uses botanical skincare products, so your skin will shimmer like the surface of a lake at twilight, except not liquid, not transparent, and not flamey. The relaxing 60-minute facial includes a lip, neck, and eye treatment and face and neck massage, leaving your entire face feeling as fresh as the day it hatched from the pod.
A half-hour microdermabrasion will utilize the power of micro crystals to slough off layers of dead skin, like peeling open a banana to reveal the creamy mashed potatoes inside. Typical results include the reduction of fine lines, wrinkles, and sun damage. Microdermabrasion can also help reduce acne scaring, as it stimulates collagen dropouts to regenerate and even out skin texture.
Groupon Says
A Word from Our Spa-nsers
Spas first became popular during the fitness craze of the 1930s, an era where it was not uncommon to see mustachioed strongmen in leopard-skin leotards lifting weights while waiting for the trolley and grumbling idly about the kaiser.
The fitness boom happened to coincide with another fad of the day: old-time radio (then called new-time radio). We recently uncovered a lost radio advertisement for Fortifying Springs, one of the earliest known spas and sponsor of the popular Grandma's Biscuit Powder Presents Detective Jimmy: Boy of Intrigue. Let's have a listen:
- My, that was a rousing tale, wasn't it, folks? I briefly half-wondered if Detective Jimmy would ever make it out of that smuggler's cave! We'll resume our program shortly, but first a word from the good people at Fortifying Springs Reinvigoration Center. Why, if I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times. No one concocts a detoxifying tincture like the apotheticians at Fortifying Springs! You might also enjoy their bone-recalcifying "jitter springs," or behold the wonders of their newly installed Battle Creek Health Builder, an oscillating fitness engine guaranteed to make Charles Atlas himself decline that extra piece of mince pie. Yes, wire your reservation today for Fortifying Springs, the only Reinvigoration Center with steamed towels!
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