Losing weight is a challenge almost as difficult as reading an entire dictionary or climbing a tree that’s covered in canola oil. Take an expert approach to tackling the task of slimming down with today's Groupon: for $850, you get a CoolSculpting treatment for one area at Crutchfield Dermatology in Eagan (a $1,500 value). Choose one of the following areas:
- Love handles on both sides of the body
- Back or bra-line fat on both sides of the body
- Upper abdomen
- Lower abdomen
Board-certified dermatologist Dr. Crutchfield and his team of friendly, experienced technicians work to purge pudge with the CoolSculpting system, a noninvasive liposuction alternative designed to contour bodies. Exhausted exercisers vexed by their lingering back fat, love handles, bra-area bumps, or padded marsupial pouches can evict freeloading fat during the one- to two-hour sculpting session. A pop of intense cold from two cooling panels crystallizes fat cells so they can be naturally flushed from the body over the following two to four months. Patients can surf the office's WiFi or peruse a magazine during the procedure, which poses little to no downtime with results visible for most patients in as little as three weeks. The majority of patrons require only one treatment per area, and weight can be kept off long-term by eating right, exercising regularly, and avoiding funhouse mirrors. Some patients experience mild redness, tingling, or bruising posttreatment, which is temporary.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Advertising Soup
In this economy, soup isn’t going to sell itself. Only the perfect commercial is going to get those cans flying off the shelves. But what are the elements of a good soup ad?
The setting can make someone immediately yearn for a bowl of the hot stuff. Good settings include:
• A wealthy person’s farmhouse glowing warmly in a snowy wooded area (farmhouse should show no signs of actual farming)
• A small but cozy shack standing on a craggy cliff over a violent sea
• A bread factory
The main character is the viewer’s connection to the soup. It should be:
• A loving yet endearingly inept dad. He is in decent shape, not too handsome, and wearing a sweater and/or tucked-in collared shirt.
• A Victorian sailor’s wife. She is pale and beautiful, yet jagged. It has been a hard life.
• A bunch of working-class bread-factory guys who are hungry but tired of all this dry bread.
The story of the ad then whips the potential customers into a soup-eating frenzy by depicting:
• The dad’s son playing in the snow. The dad wants his son to love him but he cannot prepare a meal on his own. He makes the son soup, and the two bond over a game of checkers in front of a fireplace. Mom does not interfere.
• The wife gazes longingly at the sea during a windy, daytime rainstorm. She misses her husband’s warm, hearty arms but finds solace in a thick chowder that possesses those same qualities. Just as she finishes her bowl the husband kicks down the door. He has returned from his voyage and he has brought her many exotic hats.
• The bread-factory guys make some soup and have a crazy party wherein they dip the dry crusty breads into the steaming bowls with much joviality and merrymaking. What a day they’ve had.
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