Contrary to conventional wisdom, one can in fact look a gift horse in the mouth, now that the mouth no longer houses the retina-scorching nuclear reactor that powers the horse. Get an eyeful of equine incisors with today’s Groupon: for $150, you get five one-hour private lessons (a $65 value each) or five 90-minute group lessons (a $325 value) at Joni Fitts School of Horsemanship.
The Joni Fitts School of Horsemanship employs the equine knowledge of ARICP-certified instructors as they guide students through the realm of English- and Western-style riding. Making teaching and safe horseplay their business, these gurus can help riders beef up equestrian skills during five private lessons or five group lessons. Students are taught the finer points of stallion care including hoof maintenance, equipment use, and how to properly curtsey to the horse before saddling up for each session. Ample guidance and personal attention ensure safe colt-carriage rides while instilling proper riding techniques, and an eclectic menagerie of horse folk challenges every level of rider on a course equipped with trotting poles, trail paths, and decoy carousel animals that keep classes moving at a steady clip.
Regularly cleaned bits and saddles arranged by number are neatly hung from the wooded walls of the facility, providing a tranquil and organized educational environment. Each of the school's steeds is assigned multiple bridles to accommodate the various styles of riding, including Western patterns, English jumps, and the long forgotten art of Arctic tundra burrowing. All students are required to wear pants and boots or shoes with a heel during their lessons, and helmets are supplied for all riders.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Creative Discipline Ideas
Children sleep for about 18 hours a day, but they will sometimes act out during their brief windows of lucidity. And though any parent can teach right from wrong with a timeout or by withholding attention, it takes a special parent to discipline outside the box. Here are some creative punishments for unruly children:
- The child must eat two dinners before bedtime.
- The child must read your Toy Story fan fiction in which Buzz Lightyear spends 47 pages feeling sad about his life.
- The child must watch you smoke an entire carton of cigarettes while you explain precisely why doing so hurts your body.
- The child must get a boring art degree instead of a trendy business one.
- The child must defeat a robot version of his/herself.
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