White-water rafting combines tranquil views of breathtaking scenery punctuated by moments of sheer terror, similar to watching a nature show while being shot at by hunters. Surrender to adventure with today’s Groupon: for $99, you get a one-day, two-night rafting and camping excursion on the Lower New River (up to a $155 value) and a souvenir photo CD (a $45 value) from River Expeditions in Oak Hill, West Virginia, about a three- to four-hour drive from Pittsburgh (up to a $200 total value). This deal is valid for participants age 12 and older.
Since 1972, River Expeditions has tamed West Virginia’s wild waters, blazing aquatrails along the New and Gauley rivers. Do battle with the watery forces of Mother Nature on the Lower New River rafting trip, which explores a stretch of tumultuous National Park Service–protected rapids. An expert river guide trained in CPR and first aid leads each group, using a seventh sense for the river's history to point out eye-pleasers such as naturally carved canyons and the highest vehicular bridge in America. The river ranges from Class II to Class V levels of difficulty, with patches of challenging rapids slowing into calm pools, during which paddlers can relax or write love letters for delivery by carrier pigeon. After a full day of paddling, lay under the starry night and woo companions with knowledge of river-rafting-themed constellations, such as Thor's Paddle and Could Be a Rock.
The trip leaves from River Expeditions' headquarters, about four miles southwest of the famous New River Gorge Bridge. All meals and beverages are provided; guests can bring a tent, sleeping bag, and pillow, or rent them for an additional price for their stay at the base camp. After the trip, guests will receive a photo CD compiling notable moments from the trip, allowing endless revisiting of daredevil sea-monster captures. Reservations for this deal must be made by 8/31/11, but excursions may be scheduled beyond this date.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Earning Your Learner’s Permit
Unlike memorizing the multiplication tables or operating a knife, learning to drive an automobile requires a permit in many states. Like all tests devised by adults, however, the permit test is filled with trick questions. For example:
How many wheels does a car have?
A. Four
B. Between two and five
C. The definition of "car" does not include a set number of wheels
ANSWER: A. You might think that B and C are technically correct, but adults view these answers as a dangerous gateway to the moral relativism of Dutch ethicist Baruch Spinoza, whom all adults know and hate.What shape is a stop sign?
A. An octagon
B. A plane figure composed of eight equal-length line segments
C. Like a circle, but sharper
ANSWER: Leave blank. The correct answer, "I have no idea because I'm too busy respecting my elders to notice the shape," is not offered.Here, get into this car and show me how well you can drive it.
A. OK
B. No thanks
C. Get into the what now?
ANSWER: C. Remember, this is a test for your learner's permit, so ideally, you should never have driven or even seen a car before taking the exam. Double remember, the name of every teen who fails his permit exam is printed in a special edition of the newspaper that only prom queens and college-admissions officers receive.
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