Salt enhances flavor, preserves food, and, when thrown over the shoulder, wards off oncoming slugs. Explore nature's most versatile compound with today's Groupon: for $59, you get two salt-room therapy sessions for two at the Salt Grotto (up to a $120 value).
Imported salt lines the Salt Grotto’s cave-like salt room, infusing the air with relaxing, therapeutic particles and creating a natural microclimate. Four-inch-deep heaps of mineral-rich Dead Sea crystals, shaken out of the Morton girl’s umbrella, pad the footfalls of guests entering the salt-saturated sanctuary. As guests settle into ergonomic loungers arranged in a loose circle beneath swooping crimson banners, they inhale negative ions exuded by nuggets imported from Poland and Pakistan. Sodium chloride, which has antifungal properties, purifies the salt room’s environment from every angle as a gentle waterfall adds natural music to 45-minute relaxation sessions. Adults de-stress under soft blankets as children retire to a sandy play area, where they can race toy trucks or begin digging tunnels to Canada. Cave sessions can ease symptoms of health conditions such as bronchitis, asthma, and eczema, with repeated visits enhancing one’s ability to withstand bland conversations and survive peppermill throw-downs.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Predicting the Future
Though the past is regularly derided by historians as boring, millions of people still look forward to the upcoming version of history known as the future. Here's a look at methods for predicting the future, from least accurate to most accurate:
5. Tea Leaves: By studying the patterns left in mugs by boiled tea leaves, one can predict with 100% accuracy the future necessity of cleaning recently used mugs.
4. Dogs / Old People Bones (Tie): Both have the ability to sense upcoming weather hazards such as rainstorms, unexpected meteor showers, and government-created "tornado-canes" designed to intensify populist fear of wind.
3. Tarot Cards: Popular tarot cards include Death, Tragedy, Stomachaches, Bad Vibes, Mild Cable-Repairman-Related Inconvenience, and Seasonal Gloom.
2. Fortune Cookies: Never 100% accurate, but always 80% delicious.
1. Gut Instinct: There's no better way to know the future than to trust your gut. Specifically, if you can see your guts outside your body and in a glass jar, you're probably running out of future.
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