The head's most mild-mannered residents, ears are forced to live in constant fear of being pierced, boxed, or rubbed by hockey players for good luck. Give your sonic conduits a well-earned gift with today's Groupon to see The NKOTBSB Tour featuring New Kids on the Block and the Backstreet Boys, with special guest Jordin Sparks, at the AT&T Center on Tuesday, June 28, at 7:30 p.m. Doors open at 6:30 p.m. Choose between the following options:
• For $32, you get one ticket for seating in the upper rows of sections 205–208 or 224–227 (a $49.50 value before fees, or up to a $64.26 value online, including all ticketing fees).
• For $42, you get one ticket for seating in the upper rows of sections 101–105 or 124–128 (a $69.50 value before fees, or up to an $84.80 value online, including all ticketing fees).
Beloved boy bands New Kids on the Block and the Backstreet Boys rev the engines of adoration among droves of fans with their poptastic summer tour. New Kids on the Block has been plucking heartstrings and handcrafting harmonies since 1986, combining a collection of international hits such as "Hangin' Tough" and "Step by Step" with five-part choreography and fashionable duds. Following in its footsteps, the Backstreet Boys began blowing up charts in the '90s, producing a songbook replete with favorites such as "I Want It That Way," "All I Have to Give," and "Everybody (Backstreet's Back)." The NKOTBSB Tour brings both acts together for a songful extravaganza, forming the more perfect union prophesied nearly 50 years ago by the Constitution. The Tuesday, June 28 concert also includes the vocal virtuosity of special guest and American Idol winner Jordin Sparks, adding to an ear-pleasing stew of dulcet melodies sure to soothe the most savage beast or most irascible mail carrier.
All seating is assigned on a first-come, first-served basis. The spaciousness of the AT&T Center ensures ample supplies of oxygen to fuel the full-throated cheers all performers rely upon for sustenance.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to the "Quiet Period"
The "Quiet Period" is the time right before a company "goes public," during which it is legally prohibited from saying anything to the press that may make the company look "good," "successful," or "not currently on fire." During this sensitive time, it is the duty of the press to force the adolescent company through a series of brutal hazing rituals, designed to desensitize it to public criticism. This tough love helps the naively optimistic company to thicken its skin, atrophy its soul, and finally grow up into a real corporation. Here are some traditional hazing rituals you can use to torture companies in a quiet period:
- Wait until the company is sleeping to smear scream-activated bees on its face. Lesson Learned: Don't believe your company's own "buzz."
- Photoshop the company's logo to appear to be shaking hands with James Buchanan, America's worst president. Lesson Learned: Everything you see or read about a company is true, if it's on a computer.
- Use the company's cell phone to text a vote for the new M&M's color to be a sickly ashen gray. Lesson Learned: Customers aren't capable of making their own decisions.
- Kick sand in the company's face. Lesson Learned: If the company survives, it's time to move on to sand's close relative, powdered glass.
- Write disparaging articles about the company. Lesson Learned: That's what they get for trying to be a company.
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