Like an Olympic sprinter with his head stuck in a stairway banister, vehicle engines desperately need lubrication if they're going to run properly. Oil up with today’s Groupon: for $19, you get a synthetic-blend oil change, including additional automotive checkup services, at Texas Express Lube and Auto in Kerrville (a $39.95 value).
Texas Express Lube and Auto's piston quenchers thwart friction by providing up to five quarts of blended synthetic oil. Car techs sub in crisp new oil filters to handle the motor oil, which is rated at 5W-20 or 5W-30 according to its dating-site profile. A quick checkup surveys the vehicle's fluid levels, lights, and air filters, and an interior vacuuming sucks up crumbs. Before revving back onto roadways, cars ask technicians to grease their chassis so they can travel squeak-free and to check their wiper blades so they can wave hello to raindrops. Customers can upgrade to full synthetic oil for an additional fee.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: What Makes a TV?
Enjoying television is as patriotic as knitting an apple pie or eating American flags. Here's a look at some of the components that make up these high-tech picture boxes:
• Glass: A high-end TV has a glass screen that when turned off (not recommended) will reflect your image. When turned on, it will reflect how awesome TV is.
• Cathode Ray Tube: No longer needed for modern TVs to work, but manufacturers still put one in every set just for old times' sake.
• Gold: TV signals, like men's hearts, are lustily attracted to gold, causing them to fly out of the sky into the gold brick in the back of every TV.
• A Couple of Horse Bones: 'Cause why not, right?
• Wires: They hook up to the wired helmets that all the actors wear to beam their acting into your TV.
• An Eternal Flame: To honor the former TV stars who have died.
• Tiny Fire Extinguisher: In case the eternal flame gets out of control.
• IBM PetaFlop SuperComputer: Guesses when you want to change the channel, lower the volume, etc., all to cover up the fact that the remote control doesn't do anything.
• Martin Sheen: He's gotta live somewhere.
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