Like a good horror movie, a good exercise regimen shocks the body out of its lethargy, which is why so many personal trainers chase their clients on treadmills while brandishing anacondas. Get in less terrified shape with today's Groupon: for $129, you get a wellness, relaxation, and fitness package, including a 60-minute massage (a $95 value), a chiropractic exam (up to a $125 value), two group fitness classes (a $40 value), a nutritional assessment (up to a $200 value), and an organic cooking class (a $35 value), at D.R.E.A.M. Wellness (up to a $495 total value). This Groupon is valid at locations in Pacific Beach and Del Mar.
D.R.E.A.M. Wellness's team of experienced body buffs whittles physiques into proper shape with a cornucopia of services that promote a healthy and wholesome lifestyle. Begin the revitalizing package by choosing from D.R.E.A.M.'s menu of massage services for 60-minutes of musculature relaxation that promotes circulation and can help reduce chronic pain. A chiropractic exam offers posture analysis and advice for improving spinal cords' already-impressive flagpole impersonation routines, and two group fitness classes (a $20 value each) keep bodies in tiptop shape with selections such as Zumba, yoga, and boot camp. A nutrition assessment educates clients on the benefits of a sound dietary program, the lessons of which are exemplified in an organic cooking class, providing advice on how to stay full without swallowing tennis balls.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Getting on the News
Appearing on a local news broadcast is the highest aspiration of all enlightened beings, which is why squirrels are always teaching themselves to water ski and attention-seeking houses periodically douse themselves with a beautiful new coating of fire. If you come across a news reporter speaking into a camera, try these sure-fire tactics for getting into the frame:
Dress for Success: Nothing says "put me on television" like a T-shirt that says Put Me on Television. If this fails to draw the camera's focus, reveal the shirt underneath: WFLD local meteorologist Craig Mittson: I have your cat and she is safe.
Let's Get Physical: Capture the camera's roving eye with an impressive physical feat, such as fitting your entire foot in your mouth, placing a super-gross bug on your shoulder for 30 seconds, or holding your breath while you shove over a tree.
Aim Higher: If traditional ground reporters aren't enchanted by your antics, take to the skies. The surest way to show up on a traffic report is to commandeer your own helicopter and pilot it directly beneath theirs. This may also help you to get arrested—another great way to appear on the news, or a related news-documentary program, perhaps World's Worst Helicopters or Problems: Caught on Tape.
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