Half-baked scones, like half-baked bank heists, appear completely solid at first glance, but fall apart under interrogation. Grill confectionary accomplices with today’s Groupon: for $10, you get 14 plain or raisin scones or 12 specialty homemade scones at Shakespeare’s Corner Shoppe (a $20.97 value).
Shakespeare’s Corner Shoppe appeases polished palates with an assortment of imported products, baked goods, and traditional tea service. Pastry traditionalists can take home 14 plain or raisin scones, and avant-garde gourmands can select a specialty dozen from the shop's spread of flavors, including butterscotch, cherry and almond, and english toffee. Purchasers receive scones in the form of frozen dough, which, after 20 minutes of baking, take on a homemade identity convincing enough to fool Hercule Poirot. Orders come packaged in groups of four, so those who select the specialty styles can mix and match up to three flavors to fill out their dozen. For those with dietary restrictions, raisin scones can be prepared according to gluten-free, sugar-free, vegan, and fruit-suspicious recipes.
For an authentic across-the-pond experience, Groupon customers receive 10% off afternoon tea on Shakespeare’s Corner Shoppe’s cozy flower-lined patio. Welcome the friendly company of finger sandwiches, a moist cake medley, a steaming pot of tea, and more ($19.95 for adults, $10.95 for children), all served by a sentient tea cart programmed with helpful pointers on proper etiquette.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Tipping
Tipping can be confusing: for instance, children are not expected to tip their parents, but parents are expected to tip their children (it’s called an "allowance"). Here's a guide to proper tipping:
- Waiters should be tipped 20% of your meal's cost or left 20% of your meal.
- At fancy hotels, bellhops must be allowed to take an item of their choice from any of your bags.
- In addition to getting a free mansion, mayors must be tipped a dollar amount equivalent to everyone in town's phone number added up and multiplied by two.
- Tip your wedding DJ the surprise of a lifetime—it was his wedding all along!
- Your hairstylist's tip should be $5 more than the price of the cut, plus all your loose hair woven into a baby blanket.
- Your stuntman should be tipped over a railing! And then tipped the height of the railing in dollars.
- Not technically a tip, but you owe your postman 10% of any money that he delivers.
- Doctors should be tipped all the cans of pumpkin-pie filling you can spare.
- A wife who sells her beautiful hair to buy you a pocket-watch chain should be tipped one ironic comb and one copy of O. Henry's short stories to make sure this never happens again.
- Tip yourself a whole day of relaxation—you deserve it. Also, keep any money you might normally give to charity.
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