According to Newton's fourth law, the more you drive your car, the more debris it attracts—repelling aerodynamics, the opposite gender, and gravity itself. Smooth your horseless carriage's exterior with today's Groupon to Speed Car Wash. Choose between the following services:
- For $35, you get the Ultimate Full Service Car Wash and Hand Wax (up to a $70 value).
- For $8, you get a Gold Full Service Car Wash ($15.95 Value).
Speed Car Wash tackles dirty bumpers and grimy undercarriages with a full-line of car-wash services. Treat road warriors to a deep clean with the Ultimate Full Service car wash package, which brandishes exteriors to treatments such as tire tidying, a triple foam polishing, an underbody rinse, and a 10-minute hand wax with up to 30 days of water-beading protection. Interiors luxuriate in a vacuuming, floor-mat shampoo, dust-bunny eradication, and inner dressings for elegant car proms. For carriages covered in only a few layers of gunk, choose the Gold Full Service Car Wash which shakes off spotty messes, slathers chassis in a polishing coat of shine, and soothes away lingering images of muddy cleats with a soft-towel hand-dry ($15.95).
While having cars serviced, car-familiars can kick up their feet in the customer lounge, replete with flat-screen TVs, Internet stations for web browsing, and telephones for free long-distance calls to long-lost car keys. For an additional charge, choose to overindulge roadsters with a quick oil change ($34.95) or repair services from the on-site mechanic.
Though Speed Car Wash sometimes features discounted prices online, today's Groupon still offers the best deal available.
Reviews
Five Yelpers give Speed Car Wash an average of 4.5 stars and seven Google Mappers give it four stars:
- I've had my car washed at so many services before with an ok to decent job, but the guys were thorough in vacuuming, wiping down, washing, dressing the tires and waxing the exterior. – Irene, Google Maps
- I didn't have to wait too long and the car looks great. They towel dry and take the time to make sure everything is right before returning you the keys. – Tim T., Yelp, 7/16/10
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: Historical Human Habitats
Since Homo habilis stopped eating gold and began making malleable domiciles out of it, architecture has been an important part of human existence. Here's a look at the history of human inhabitance:
- Australopithecus: Lived in caves to avoid their most fearsome predator—insecurity—which attracted their second most fearsome predator—giant bats.
- Homo habilis: The first humans to have souls, these marmoset-sized people-predecessors lived in giant nests inside of caves.
- Homo erectus: Like us in so many ways, but with a brain two-thirds the size of our own and entirely without skin, "Upright Man" lived in caves.
- Neanderthals: Unlike earlier humans who lived in caves, Neanderthals buried their dead, though they also did live in caves.
- Homo Superior: Will live in space-caves.
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