It's no accident that soccer is the most popular sport in the world—it requires little equipment, is fast paced, has clear rules, and can be played while holding a baby. Revel in the "beautiful game" with today's Groupon: for $16, you get an all-inclusive corner seat ticket to see the Seattle Sounders play the Houston Dynamo on March 25 at 7 p.m (a $37 value). Your ticket includes hot dogs, soda, and other stadium fare; this Groupon is not valid for alcohol.
Like a sonic boom roaring across the field, the Seattle Sounders tear up turf and footapult cobblestoned balls into nets in their quest for glory. Joining the Rave Green roster is Argentine midfielder Mauro Rosales, a veteran of the gold-medal winning team at the 2004 Olympics and 2001 FIFA U20. Rosales's clever passing and playmaking skills bring cohesion to a team already synchronized through relentless practice, a group-ESP, and head-coach Sigi Schmid’s leadership. For the Houston Dynamo's part in the 90-minute duel, team captain Brian Ching galvanizes his team into a piranha-like goal-scoring frenzy that leaves nothing but scraps of cloth blowing along the vacant playing field.
As you refresh your throat's cheerynx with hot dogs and soda in between halves, the home team's 53-member marching band Sound Wave keeps the frequently sold-out stadium at maximum volume with a blend of Latin, funk, big-band, and rock music.
Groupon Says
The Groupon Guide to: The SATs
12. Which of the following words is genuine?
(A) Nonplussed
(B) Bonjour
(C) Fourthmeal
(D) $@$$¥
50. Lugubrious is to obsequious as __ is to cantankerous
(A) Raunchy
(B) Lachrymose
(C) On fire
(D) Shop at Spencer's for the cool things adults hate
75. Which of the following would be a good name for a golden retriever who wears a red handkerchief?
(A) Jake
(B) Little Hungry Lump Machine
(C) The Dogdustrial Revolution
(D) Hello!
137.
200. How much does a car usually cost?
(A) $10,000
(B) $33,000
(C) $14,995 (with options shown here)
(D) $10,000
666. You are in jail. What have you done?
(A) Stolen something that belongs in a museum
(B) Finally made my point about leash laws in America
(C) Blood! Blood everywhere!
(D) I do not break laws and deserve to go to college
Answers: A, D, B, a good picture of a turtle, B, D
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