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According to the foremost doctrine in ancient Chinese medicinal texts: “Those who say diseases are incurable have not mastered the art of acupuncture and do not deserve to eat from my potato tree.” Today’s Groupon puts this historical healing treatment in the nimble, all-knowing hands of the professionals at Haas Acupuncture. For $39, you get an initial consultation followed by a one-hour session of holistic acupuncture relief, a $120 value. A movie featuring Reno Raines, rogue acupuncturist, is set to be released soon, tentatively titled The Acupuncturist Who Travels Around and Gets into Adventures.