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Enduring the unending mysteries of island life requires roughly six seasons worth of diligent concentration, copious patience, and bushels of island fare. Today's Groupon gets you $30 worth of Polynesian palate-pleasers and retro cocktails at Trader Vic's in Scottsdale for $15. Bring your best beachcombers to find these tasty treasures guarded by savage island dogs and buried in the side of the renowned Hotel Valley Ho.