If you’re ready to cash in summer Fridays on a Tuesday and your warm-weather uniform involves a BBQ-stained apron, these outdoor activity deals are the perfect fit for your 4th of July:
$25 for $50 Worth of Athletic Shoes and Apparel – Reebok’s products have been genetically engineered to enhance your athletic performance.
U.S. Flag Kit– An Old Glory flag—made in the U.S.A. with sewn stripes, embroidered stars, and durable construction
Gourmet Meat Grilling Packages – Omaha Steaks provides you with steaks, pork chops, chicken breasts, and hot dogs–everything you need to host a grill fest. You’ll just need to supply the locale and novelty bikini smock.
Intoxicase for the iPhone: A stainless-steel bottle opener embedded in polycarbonate case marries iPhone protection with convenient beverage access.
Another outdoor activity: Fireworks. Every year we celebrate patriotism by taking one of the most lethal and powerful substances on earth and launching it far above the heads of thousands of innocent onlookers. Keep from colliding with a flaming ball of matter by following these helpful hints:
- Don’t let fireworks get away from you. Set them off in controlled, enclosed space, such as a barn or the dungeon of a government building.
- Once you’ve lit a firework, stand back. You’re going to need space if you’re going to run after it and catch it before it can hurt anyone.
- Teenagers love fire (their hormonal bodies feed off flames). Put all the teenagers you know in an unsupervised house where they can be safe together while you adults deal with the fireworks.
- If a firework comes at you, fight it. You won’t benefit from playing dead because fireworks grow stronger when they see human suffering.
- The only way to weaken a firework’s power is to celebrate your country’s triumphs and sing anthems of national pride with all your might.
Have a safe and fun holiday!