5 Things To Help You Prepare For The Arrival Of "Planet X"

BY: Joseph R |Dec 11, 2018

[caption id="attachment_10317" align="alignnone" width="590"]"Nothing will survive. Not even bacteria." "Nothing will survive. Not even bacteria."[/caption] Well, it's officially happening: the end of the world! FINALLY, am I right? This last season of Existence really seemed to jump the shark, so I'm glad they're finally-- ...wait. You didn't hear? Yeah bro! World's endin', F'REALS THIS TIME! How?! Okay, SO: "Planet X," or "Nibiru," is this phantom planet that's hurtling towards Earth and gonna destroy us on September 23rd, 2017. It's SO real, even NASA confirmed it. So once you make peace with the oncoming demise of humanity and find yourself sufficiently freaked out, check out our list below of 5 things you NEED to prepare yourself for the arrival of Planet X. 1. R.E.M.'s In Time: The Best of R.E.M. 1988 - 2003 What better way to star the apocalypse than with a DOPE soundtrack, amirite? I mean "It's The End Of The World" was literally written FOR this kind of occasion (sources say it's about a world ending!), and Barnes & Noble has it in stock! You could of course just stream it on whatever electronic device you have, but...if the world's ending, is money really an object? 2. A solid outdoor jacket from Eddie Bauer (for survival) Given the impact of a giant phantom-planet will utterly devastate our climate and bring about a new Ice Age, you're gonna need a good jacket for that! Shop Eddie Bauer to grab a jacket that'll shield you from the post-apocalyptic elements, but keep you looking FABULOUS! 3. A Meal Subscription from Blue Apron, to one-up food scarcity! Let's be real: Planet X hitting the Earth is gonna also kill a whole lot of planets and animals, making food scarce. Luckily, we have a great lifehack for this: get a meal subscription from Blue Apron! No need to hunt and gather when your sustenance is delivered right to your door! 4. An Amazon Echo, so Alexa can answer all your questions about a nuclear winter Quick: how much do you know about the after-effects of a mass impact on the Earth's surface? Not much, right? Well, what better way to acclimate to your planet's newly broken ecosystem than by carting around an A.I. capable of answering all your questions? Despite their questionable business dealings/kidnappings-of-Groupon-interns, we stand by Amazon's Echo as your best chance of surviving Nibiru's bear-hug of the Earth. 5. A real T.A.R.D.I.S., to stop Planet X (from eBay) Know what the best thing to have in a post-Planet-X-collision world would be? A space/time-traveling machine that can reverse said collision of Planet X! Head to eBay and get a real live T.A.R.D.I.S. so you can prevent humanity's destruction AND save money while doing so! We sincerely hope you have the BEST Nibiru Day possible, and that our list of great offers here on Groupon Coupons will make the upcoming catastrophe all the more memorable!