What You'll Get
Like cars, human beings require occasional corrective bodywork, custom finishing, and fresh coats of wax to avoid being towed away and crushed into a cube. Keep your chassis classy with today's Groupon at Advanced Massage and Laser Therapy on Corydon Avenue. Select between these pain-dispelling options:
- For $45, you get a half-hour massage and cold wave laser therapy session (a $90 value).
- For $42, you get a spinal decompression therapy session (an $85 value).
Advanced Massage and Laser Therapy's staff of massage therapists and certified laser techs assuage the stress and pain associated with conditions such as headaches, carpal tunnel syndrome, or walls falling on you. Spinal photo-decompression employs a special monitoring device that lets the operator to put negative pressure on roaming discs until they retreat to their spine caves. Such realignment addresses the source of recurring irritation rather than simply fooling the brain into believing you are an impervious automaton. Customers can also opt to pair low-level laser therapy, which encourages natural cellular healing by increasing the oxygen and blood flow to targeted areas, with a massage in one of four flavours—classic Swedish for stress relief, deep-tissue for tight muscles, sports massage for athletic types, and pregnancy massage for expectant or recent mothers.
The Fine Print
Promotional value expires Jul 24, 2011. Amount paid never expires. Limit 1 per person, may buy 2 additional as gifts. By appointment only. Merchant is solely responsible to purchasers for the care and quality of the advertised goods and services.
About Advanced Massage & Laser Therapy Clinic
Through massage, laser therapy, and injectables, Advanced Massage & Laser Therapy Clinic's Dr. B.A. Mallick and registered nurse Holly Vezina help clients shed discomfort and skin issues. The professionals glide low-level lasers over injured or painful muscle tissue to increase oxygen and blood flow to the affected area, and they pair the treatment with therapeutic massages to relieve pain caused by working or attempting to hoist a car to upstage showboating superheroes. To shoo away facial signs of age and stress, Holly deposits expertly injected serums into tissues to relax taut muscles and relieve wrinkles, a treatment she's practiced for more than eight years.:m]]