In addition to experiencing the humiliation of being buried by dogs and dug up by science teachers, skeletons are ornery because they lack the musculature necessary to get massaged. Avoid taking your skin for granted with today's Groupon: for $40, you get a one-hour deep-tissue massage at Advantage Massage Centers in Hurst (an $85 value).
Advantage Massage Centers’ experienced stress-assuagers massage away muscle vexations in private rooms, each appointed with heated tables, lulling lighting, and peaceful music. The deep-tissue massage zeroes in on chronic muscle tension perpetrated by repetitive motions, misalignment, and injuries lingering from a past life as a contortionist. For 60 transcendental minutes, a skilled therapist works out deep tension and unties perplexing Flemish knots from sinews’ substrata with the targeted pressure of dexterous digits. You'll leave the Advantage Massage Centers' premises with muscular fibers singing as harmoniously as a barbershop quartet, instead of screeching like the lead singer in a Norwegian death-metal barbershop quartet.