For too long, the gentle laser has been forced into a mind-numbing existence of reading an endless number of bar codes and destroying planets. Give laser light a much-deserved career change with today's Groupon for cosmetic laser treatments at Alpine Plastic & Reconstructive Surgery, located in McKay Dee Hospital. Choose from two options:

• For $60, you get $150 toward one laser tattoo-removal treatment (treatments start at $150).
• For $700, you get four Fraxel laser treatments (a $3,000 value).

The JCAHO–accredited Alpine Plastic & Reconstructive Surgery center's experienced aesthetician harnesses imperfection-blasting laser beams to rejuvenate sullied and ink-stained skins. Under the supervision of Dr. Randall Barnett, Alpine’s technician erases the tangible memory of now-completed to-do lists using Alex TriVantage laser tattoo removal, a tri-laser lawman who effectively outlaws ink of all colors. Bodies naturally devour broken-down particles in the 4-to-8-week healing period, with the possibility of a slight darkening or lightening of treated areas. A local lidocaine injection is offered to ease potential discomfort. Full removal can require anywhere from 5 to 15 treatments, and customers may buy multiple Groupons for this option. The minimum price of a single session is $150 and can cover up to a 6”x6” area (this price may be higher due to factors such as tattoo coloring, size, ink type, and skin tone).

Clarify and protect hides with a SkinMedica cleansing agent and an SPF 30 sunscreen before a Fraxel laser treatment fashions dermal landscapes as smooth as Barry White lyrics embroidered on a silk pillow. Abate pesky acne pockmarks, fine lines, and uneven tones in a 45-minute session. Alpine Plastic & Reconstructive Surgery suggests arriving an hour early for the topical application of a numbing solution. Treated facial features may be swollen and/or pink for three–seven days.