Keeping teeth clean and white is the first and only step in coping with the fact that your skeleton is slowly escaping from your body through your mouth. Deal with it with today's Groupon: for $60, you get one SpaWhite express teeth-whitening session at Amadeus Spa in Canton (a $119 value).

Amadeus Spa's accomplished bite blanchers banish stains from teeth using the safe and speedy SpaWhite express system. Foam strips laden with a gentle yet powerful peroxide formula ensconce each row of tawny tusks, working in tandem with a cool blue LED light to dropkick stains caused by aging, smoking, or gargling with paint. Over the course of 15 minutes, teeth turn two to four shades whiter, helping patients obtain a younger-looking smile without the use of gooey whitestrips or bulky bleaching trays.