Like a treehouse, a gym never lets nonmembers inside and always deflects frogs fired from the neighborhood bully’s slingshot. Hurry up the rope ladder with today's Groupon for Anytime Fitness. Choose between the following options:
- For $30, you get a 30-day trial membership which includes unlimited MMA and Brazilian jiu-jitsu classes at the Glendale Heights location (a $180 value).
- For $30, you get a 30-day trial membership, which includes unlimited boot camp classes, at the Geneva location (a $180 value).
Anytime Fitness, as the name suggests, is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and 512 days a year with nonstop security. Novice calorie burners and ripped Michelangelo models alike can take advantage of a 30-day membership ($35 plus $100 enrollment fee), which equips bodies with enough treadmills, cycles, elliptical machines, and weights to make them fit enough to run a marathon inside a swimming pool filled with mud. Enrich fat-frying and muscle-mass-magnifying sessions with 30 days of unlimited MMA and Brazilian jiu-jitsu classes at the Glendale Heights location (a $45 value), which train bodies with traditional martial arts techniques in order to instill students with self-confidence, physical strength, and defensive reflexes. Brawnier bodies emerge after 30 days of unlimited boot camp classes at the Geneva location, where small troops meander through circuit trainings that target upper body, lower body, and the core to support strength training and cardiovascular fitness concurrently, much like running in a suit made of paperweights (a $45 value).
Anytime Fitness's open schedule makes sure there are no excuses not to get in shape, unlike its competitor, Nevertime Fitness, which only opens its single Barrow, Alaska location during solar eclipses.