Colons, like garages, attics, and your nosy neighbor’s memory need a healthy cleaning at least once a year. Purge past impurities with today’s Groupon to Aquarian Wellness. Choose between the following options:
- For $30, you get one colon-hydrotherapy session (a $65 value).
- For $45, you get three 60-minute infrared-sauna sessions (a $105 value).<p>
Aquarian Wellness’s detoxifying treatments draw from ancient Ayurvedic cleansing practices and philosophies to rejuvenate clients’ overall health. During the colon-hydrotherapy session, temperature-controlled, filtered water flushes the colon to dislodge and wash away accumulated waste, toxins, and Bazooka Joe wrappers. The treatment removes poisons from potential contact with the lymphatic and circulatory systems, purifying the body and keeping the immune system purring. The treatment can help clients lose weight and inspire feelings of overall wellbeing, relaxation, and willingness to try brussels sprouts. The infrared sauna’s gentle heat boosts sweat production and stimulates the body’s own internal heat to facilitate natural detoxification through boosted circulation and lymphatic processes. As the body perspires, heavy metals and environmental toxins evacuate the body to leave clients as unencumbered as asteroids eloping into deep space. Within the toasty sauna’s confines, clients lose excess water weight and can assuage minor muscle aches due to tension or arthritis.
Aquarian Wellness adheres to the principles of ayurveda, an ancient Indian healing philosophy. Specializing in treatments designed to rejuvenate bodies inside and out, the staff conducts organ-purifying colon hydrotherapy, sweat-inducing infrared-sauna sessions, and circulation-boosting lymphatic drainages. Walnut-hued wooden sculptures with sleek silhouettes reminiscent of the human figure stand beneath the soaring ceilings. Oriental rugs pad feet amid glass cases full of elixirs and potted plants that rustle gently like fighting origami cranes. Clients meander past rose-colored expanses of marble draped in complimentary towels and use alkaline-filtered water to clean up and rehydrate. Aquarian Wellness is open from 1 p.m. to 9 p.m. Tuesday–Sunday.