After navigating floating platform staircases, dodging living-room-level bosses, and searching for randomly appearing bathroom keys, most homeowners come to regret purchasing houses built by video-game designers. Today's Groupon offers respite from the chaos: for $134, you get a one-night stay in a queen retreat room plus a $25 spa credit (up to a $269 total value) at Barton Hill Hotel & Spa, located in Lewiston.

Barton Hill furnishes boutique hotel environs with a subtle sophistication within sight of the Niagara River. Soothingly appointed guest rooms feature fine Italian linens for fashioning impromptu togas or constructing a lightweight yurt. Other amenities include in-room fireplaces, flat-panel televisions, and iPod docking stations. The on-site Landing Wine Bar—open Wednesday through Saturday—serves an extensive selection of wines alongside an abbreviated menu featuring gourmet flatbread pizzas and pan-seared scallops. During more hospitable months, dining is available upon the Sunset Terrace with a view of the Niagara Gorge. Dispel ennui and muscle atrophy with a visit to the exercise facilities or Lewiston's local attractions, which include the downtown area's historic homes and the Artpark, a venue for concerts, musicals, and other performances.

The full-service spa with salon on the first floor of the hotel is staffed by a fully licensed cadre of aestheticians and tense muscle kneaders. Get dolled all proper with a haircut ($30 men, $40 women) or mustache and beard trim ($15), or abandon strains with an hour-long Swedish massage ($80).