Similar to past tenses, tense backs are related to things that happened a while ago and are incomprehensible to most 5-year-olds. Brush up on the basics of back bliss with today's Groupon: for $34, you get your choice of a 90-minute, full-body Swedish or deep-tissue massage at Bethany Renewal Center (a $75 value).
At Bethany Renewal Center, licensed massage therapist Melissa Hemmert skillfully coaxes the kinks out of backs, torsos, and limbs. A Swedish massage employs long, soothing strokes and massage oil, as dexterous digits relieve tension and soothe overworked muscles. The session can improve blood flow, stimulate the lymphatic system, relieve physical tension, and melt stress into a puddle of biodegradable papier-mâché. Designed to either relieve general aches and pains or focus on more localized problems, a deep-tissue massage aims to get at the root of the client's innermost maladies. Before returning newly tamed physiques to the wild, each guest leaves with an anthology of exercises to perform at home to help to quell muscle tension and correct postural problems.