Without personal watercraft, individuals needing to flee awkward dates with fish would have to wait to be rescued by a friend's phone call or a ride atop a perfectly thrown spiral by John Elway. Take a spin across tides with today's Groupon: for $39, you get a two-hour jet-ski rental from BNB Jet Ski Rental, located inside Cedar Hill State Park (a $125 value). A $300 refundable security deposit is required at the time of rental.

After visiting BNB Jet Ski Rental, up to three wave wranglers per group can straddle a 2009 Sea-Doo watercraft for two hours of heart-racing fun. The buoyant personal cruisers volunteer their breeze-butchering services to riders of any age, allowing even children to forget about pending marriage proposals and let loose alongside adult drivers. To ensure the safety of each ebb conqueror, BNB adorns operators and passengers in sink-free, Coast Guard–approved safety vests that must be worn at all times and for all yearbook photos. A valid photo ID is required for rental, and BNB will not rent out speedsters to anyone intoxicated by alcohol, drugs, or blinding power trips over subservient whitecaps.