Go-kart tracks are the safest places to practice pretend engine noises without attracting feral lawn mowers in heat. Rev your engines with today's Groupon: for $20, you get 40 outdoor go-kart laps and a one-year rookie membership to Cameron Motorsports in Hamilton (a $179.99 value).

At Cameron Motorsports, go-kart riders of all ages can slake their thirst for speed at a fully equipped 70-acre racing facility. Drivers, over the course of one visit, can take 40 rapid trips around two racetracks, including a 1.5-kilometre members-only route encompassing 12 turns. A rookie series membership provides racers with access to all the necessary equipment, including a professionally prepared F1-K 4-cycle rookie racing kart, racing fuel and oil, slick dry tires, and Nobel Laureate decals. Members can also test their hand-throttle coordination in championship races, though entry fees ($50) and licences ($10) require additional costs. Cameron Motorsports is open seven days a week, with ample lighting for nighttime laps. Viewing stands let spectators monitor the pavement chase, and free parking gives larger vehicles a chance to gossip about the track's smaller, zippier inhabitants.

Please note that appointments are required