Looking a gift horse in the mouth may turn a party into an etiquette lesson, whereas looking a gift basilisk in the eyes will turn the birthday girl to stone. Give curse-free gifts and goods with today's Groupon: for $39, you get a balloon bouquet and teddy bear from Charter Surplus Marketing Foundation (an $80 value). This offer includes shipping to anywhere in the United States and the American territories on the moon.

Charter Surplus Marketing Foundation stuffs baskets and hearts with thoughtful "Get Well Soon" wishes, birthday gifts, and "Thinking of You" mementos brimming with thematic balloon bouquets anchored by an adorable soft teddy bear. Gift givers can brighten a loved one's day with a special 12 balloon arrangement of holiday floatables for Christmas tidings, heart-shaped helium containment centers for Valentine's proclamations, or amoeba-shaped orbs that say "Happy Origin of the Species Day." A plush teddy bear companion sits stoically beneath the colorful bouquets to ensure maximum cuddleability. Personalize each hovering nosegay with a special message to lovingly say "Thanks" or "You're the Best" to friends, or sarcastically write "Thanks. You're the best" to enemies.