Jump to: Scary Movies Sure to Make You Jump
As December 21, 2012, approaches, many Americans eagerly await the moment when Hades will emerge from the Underworld to recklessly devour raw egg. Until then, experience man-made terror with today's Groupon: $10 gets you a ticket to Chronicles of the Cursed: Hades Emerges, a massive, nightmarish haunted house adventure ($20 value). Be the first to witness the gory horror as it ascends from the depths to torture torture-hungry souls with an opening weekend ticket; good from 7 p.m.–10 p.m. for Friday, October 9; Saturday, October 10; or Sunday, October 11. Dare your friends to witness the spine-tingling goblins and humiliate your weak-bladdered enemies.
Fear is the secret to happy marriages, lasting friendships, and the final ingredient in numerous madman-created serums. Lead your scared sweetie and ghoulish gang through 20,000 square feet of severed heads and ghastly apparitions. Snuggle, shiver, and shout as you claw through a gritty gauntlet of corpses, chainsaws, evil toys, blood-demanding parking meters, and more. In the center of the dreadful scenario, a helix rises 30 feet into the air, a dreadful helix. It's perfect for aspiring actors or auctioneers searching for an acceptable place to practice blood-curdling screams.
Near the corner of Grand and Halsted (easily accessible from Milwaukee and the Grand Blue Line stop), the disturbing massacre of humanity threatens to topple previous notions of haunted houses. The design-conscious will be impressed by the artful fusion of steampunk, anime, and classic horror iconography. More than 50 displays and 600 props create a factory of fright that will produce nail-biting horrors for the rest of your life, however long that may be.
Scary Movies Sure to Make You Jump
Scary movie season is filled with genuinely scary flicks, but there are also a number of less-terrifying stinkers:
- President’s Day: All of the deceased presidents rise from their tombs and run for President again.
- A Nightmare on Murder Street Part 6: To everyone’s surprise, undead dream-murderer Dale doesn’t go on a murder spree but does start committing mail fraud.
- The Historical Haunting of Madeline: A bunch of ghosts don’t do all that much to secure a PG-13 rating.
- The Wyoming Chainsaw Massacre: A chainsaw wielding maniac can’t find one person to murder in the least populous state.
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