Without a seasonal cleaning, bodies won’t have room to house Thanksgiving turkey or the piles of leaves that need to be eaten off the front yard. Free up some space with today’s Groupon to Cleansing Day Spa in Brooklyn. Choose from the following options:
- For $25, you get one colonic (a $55 value).
- For $39, you get three colonics (a $145 value).
- For $59, you get five colonics (a $240 value).
At Cleansing Day Spa, the knowledgeable staff instructs clients on how to deliver self-administered colonics on a comfortable Colenz hydrotherapy machine. Once nestled atop the equipment’s cushioned backrest and curved leg bolster, patrons insert a slender, flexible rectal tube that introduces water into the body. The temperate water is quadruple filtered and screened for scraps of pro-Bolshevik propaganda, and it hydrates colon walls during a series of fills and releases that softens impacted waste and stimulates the body’s natural peristalsis.
Throughout the 40-minute treatment, waste is evacuated into a recessed basin, where jets of water wash it away without mess or odor. An experienced hydrotherapist will be on standby for any questions, but otherwise clients are left alone, mostly clothed and draped with a sheet, to discreetly choreograph their own treatment. Afterward, patrons can re-nourish their bodies with a packet of complimentary supplements and an edible poster of the food pyramid.